Kissthestars

Hi, I'm new here. I have been in recovery for 5 years from a meth addiction and have discovered my boyfriend of 4 years is addicted to oxys. I'm so hurt! Long story as short as possible, I have been living with my boyfriend for 4 years and my two teenagers from a former relationship. In the last year my once loving caring boyfriend became addicted to smoking oxys which rapidly turned into him lying daily, stealing my money, things from my children, robbing friends, dissapearing,stealing/pawning household items ect. and either ignoring me or being aggressive towards me. Never once in our entire 4 years did I suspect or think he would ever cheat on me. Our household became chaotic with me acting like a crazy detective,kicking him out and wanting him back, and my sadness and pain coming out as anger. I was so focused on him that I stopped caring for my own needs and flunked out of school which I had been so excited about finally returning to. After several promises by him to stop and many attempts to bring him to detox and treatments, he left for a few days and then called me from the hospital and wanted to go to treatment. He didn't think he would stay at detox in our area and has so many contacts in our area so I bought him a ticket to go to the other side of the state where his sister was waiting and took him to detox and he then went to a 30 day treatment facility because he though getting away from people in our area was best and I agreed to the fullest. Our relationship never ended and we were in a good place with eachother, so I thought. I supported him and tried my best to forgive and not focus on all the wrong he had done to me. I love this man and I truly believe he loves me. Now, he is out of treatment. Everything was going well and seemed very positive except for the fact that my children want nothing to do with him and I felt it was too soon for him to live with us as well. I felt he needed to earn some trust back as he has stole so much from us ect.. Together we came up with a plan for the focus to be on sobriety and for us to remain together long distance which we would see eachother often as I can easily visit him on weekends. We new this would be hard as we were used to being together everyday but he didn't feel stable enough to live on his own in our area so I paid for a deposit and rent for him at a sober living home with all male roomates, brought his truck to him because he had a work opportunity through our friend, and could get to NA meetings ect.. and the plan was for him to continue to live on the other side of the state for a few months tops. We had a great 4 days together on my first visit to see him ect...and he seemed excited to have pills out of his system and have a fresh start in a new place. The following week he was active in NA with his roomates which I thought was awesome. Life seemed great....for one week. Then, he came home for court this week. On his second day staying back in our home he started acting a little "shady" and I jumped to accusing him. Well, then his phone was lying there so I looked. There was a new text to a former drug contact that said basically whats up ect? I freaked out and took the phone and acted psycho locking myself in the car as he deperately knocked on my windows to get it back. His main focus was to get the phone back not my feelings of hurt that he tried to contact this person. I drove away to look through the phone and cut it off (like this is really going to stop any drug use)because yes, like an idiot I pay that bill too. Well, I noticed several calls to a male name in the new city he lives in and thought nothing of it..prob a male roomate of his? Then I went to his pics...where there I found it..several pictures of a woman! After everthing this is the last thing I would have thought!! Turns out after all the lies and damage and all the support I have given him...one week of going to NA and he meets a girl whom according to her(I found her number was the male name with so many calls) he has been pursuing her and calling her constantly and they have been exchanging pictures and hung out together. WTF!!!!???? Kicked him out for one day,now I let him back. Now, we are back in crazy mode because I'm bringing it up every 10 minutes and going back and forth between crying and yelling and all he can say is "I dont care about the dumb B" but can't explain any details!! I'm so angry!!! I've kicked him out so many times and take him back I look like an idiot. Can't be with him there with that going on and can't have him at my house with distrust. 4 years down the drain? Sorry for the long vent session. Any experience with husbands/boyfriends meeting someone in NA ? Trying not to make this all about me but he went to NA for help/support and he made the decision to pursue someone and hurt me worse!! Now can't even trust him going to NA!! Sad!!