I joined a 12 step codie group at the same time I joined my Al Anon group.
My Al Anon group is so laid back, we have a "loving interchange" which we do not consider cross talk. We are not stiff with rules and we can not live in fear of saying something out of line. I LOVE my group
But the 12 step group: People would be crying and it was not encouraged to hug or address the person crying. I once got up to use the bathroom in my group and was told when I returned to "hold off on using the washroom until the end of the group"
I lasted in there 4 weeks. Too many rules it felt unsafe.