sloefire

Hi, everyone.

There aren't a lot of people, offline, to whom I can admit this. I'm a professional, somewhat known in my community. I thought my drinking was a bad habit but under control until 10 days ago when I misjudged how much I'd had and passed out on a weeknight. My daughter tried to wake me up so I'd put her to bed, I somehow pocket-dialed a friend, he heard her calling me repeatedly without any response from me, and the next thing I knew, there was a police officer at my door checking to make sure I was all right.

I'm still mortified. My kids are straight-A students, mannerly in public, all the things a mom hopes for. The three of us have been through a lot, and they're surviving. I owe it to them to at least survive, too.

So I'm here. I'll go to an AA meeting the next weekend I don't have my kids. For now, I just wanted to tell someone that yes, I'm an alcoholic, I've broken up with vodka, but so far vodka isn't taking my goodbye very well. Keeps telling me I'll be back, I'll miss him, I can't live without him...geez, now that I've broken up with him, I'm seeing what a dysfunctional relationship it's been! I definitely need a support system to keep me strong and not go back to him.

Thank you to everyone for being here.

-sloefire