kpk

all of you out there I am sure - will know this anguish
I am nearly 40 years old and this is my first post
I hold down a great job, 2 gorgeous kids and a wife who is only starting to realise how much of a problem my drinking has become
When she confronted me at midnight last week - a full bottle of wine drunk - she didn't realise that was the second one I had raced through.
It is always cold crisp white wine!-nothing else really gives me the craving like thinking about sitting down to 2 full wine bottles - and that is going to be the hardest thing to break
Didn't even drink until 18 -then really got the taste - and now it is dangerous.
My pattern is usually 1 night hitting it hard- then 1 night off - but occasionally I have binges of a few days.
Never miss work though - though I wonder about the quality -I seem to have got away so far with it
Thing is I LOVE HANGOVER FREE MORNINGS !!!
I just need to keep remembering that
But here comes the problem - I have swore to my wife that that was it -
and last 7 days have been fine - even better than that - they have been great.
But she is away tomorrow night. and again for longer period later in month
I find myself picturing the bottle open- the minute all is quiet
ANDTHE PULL IS SOOOO STRONG.
I honestly just don't know which way tomorrow night will swing
I want to be strong - and it is easy in morning to be strong - but as day creeps on -I can feel the pangs building
I will be at home along with 2 kids - and nobody else around to take my mind off things
Any help - so gratefully appreciated
Thanks