I think if we use the term "dry drunk" on these boards, it should probably be used for someone newly sober that has characteristics that are related to drinking only, but then we would have to narrow down exactly what those characteristics are...and it seems they are not the same for everyone, so the term is essentially meaningless except for that it helps people here vent frustration.
He sure sounds like a person that is very judgmental of others. It sounds like your relationship with him was abusive, manipulating, and controlling.