Yes...it's amazing how we all rationalize these things. Almost every night I promised myself I would NOT drink in the mornings anymore, yet each morning the first thought of the day was getting downstairs before my husband to I would have a few minutes to pour my drink and find an appropriate hiding place for my glass....spice cabinet, Tupperware cabinet, below the bathroom sink (I would spend a LONG time in the bathroom putting my make up on).
Through all that, I would ask myself.."why am I doing this? I don't even enjoy it!"...and then I would raise the glass to my lips yet again.
I wish you all the best in your continuing fight against this disease!