Hi. When I first got to AA I unfortunately did not want to do what the hard liners suggested and tried and tried my foolish ways and I got worse until I surrendered to following directions. Guess what? It's worked for over 30 years for me! I've become a hard liner as I see so many repeating the same old same old, expecting different results. It starts with getting honest with ourselves. Next we don't pick up the first drink even if our ast falls off. The hows are posted here and at AA meetings IF we want them and surrender to toxic alcohol. Simple tho not always easy