Originally Posted by
wehav2day 
things are decent here, home life is calmer. we had a really nice, mellow weekend. still taking it as it comes. feel kind of bad about that, like I should have some solution and put it into action, but I don't have one yet so plan to keep plugging and chugging until it comes. just hope she is patient with me... in the past, I've thought I should have a solution and made something up or sugarcoated things and then gotten pissed or resentful and sometimes drank.
WeHav, this is what I did too. Please be patient with yourself girl. It's a long road in front of us. For so long we used alcohol to escape from our problems. Sugar coating things and drinking the resentment away was our M.O. It takes time to learn new coping skills. I know mine were not fully functional to begin with so it will take extra time. Relationships are hard and the ups and downs of months of sobriety don't help. As you know I had a really hard time with my partner. I did not think we were gonna make it. I am glad I did not make any decisions or talk too much about it with him because things have gotten better. Not a bed of roses, but a place where I think we are salvageable with some work. Sober time has allowed me to start doing this work and also given me the confidence to expect my partner to be working at it too
