as someone who ISN'T there and only going by what you share - that sounds like an AWFUL way to live. i don't know what his trip is, but his behaviors are way out of line, abusive, controlling and downright creepy. the whole sex on demand all the time thing? ewwww. that ain't love, that's lack of impulse control on his part.
you have the RIGHT to say NO. you have the RIGHT to leave for work on time. you have the RIGHT to be free of his ridiculous demands. you have the RIGHT to a happy life, and your children most assuredly deserve one.
what you describe is NOT normal. is NOT typical early recovery. and it's not healthy, for anyone. i hope you begin to see that. being chased down by ANYONE, being yelled at, put down, having your movements controlled, living in fear, not being able to trust him with the kids....it is highly unlikely that HE will change enough to become a suitable partner or parent.