My BF is in medication assisted therapy from a serious opiate addiction of 35 years duration (on and off). He has been doing really well for the past week or so. Just started on subs last week, and we've both been so happy. This morning, when I gave him his medication strip he put it in his pocket, and said that he wanted to take it mid-day because when he took it in the morning, he would start to jones by nighttime. I suggested that maybe he take half in the morning and half at night. A little while later his boss called, but it didn't neccessarily sound to me like he was talking to his boss. I also saw him looking out the window, and he said he heard a dog barking and wanted to see what the fuss was about? His user x-girlfriend has been to our house before. So I started to get suspicious, and 1) asked him to PLEASE take at least half of his medication in front of me, which he did and then 2)asked to see his phone (and in fact, it was his boss who had called). And he was like "you REALLY don't trust me do you. it kind of hurts my feelings." So am I just being insecure? I guess that's an understatement right. Question, how can I support his recovery and "trust but verify" without leaving him feeling violated? Also, I know I can't monitor him every minute of every hour of every day, but I do find myself checking his phone, and I'm paranoid that I know people are still texting and calling him and trying to tempt him. Thus far he hasn't really done anything to betray my trust, but I am constantly paranoid. In truth, he could just use if and when he wanted to and I would never know it. How can I stop myself from constantly questionning him? What IS a HEALTHY boundary when I am trying to support him in his recovery, but not be a stalker? Where is the balance between "trust but verify"?