My drinking was a habit but only french lager on a nightly basis for 20 plus years.
so 20+ years of nightly/daily drinking....then NO drinking and now this idea has bubbled up that you can JUST drink on the weekends.
hmmm. well two schools of thought here. if you NEVER drink again, you effectively have your drinking under control. if you drink again, there will be one of two outcomes....you now have the ability to control and moderate which you never had before.....or you don't.
if you don't, then what the heck are you gonna do? quitting doesn't EASIER over time, the alcoholic machine keeps on a crankin'.
you mention a couple things you feel you can't do anymore. there must be a companion list of all the things you CAN do now that you do not drink......can you list any? what's more important - campfires or getting drunk?