welcome to our SR family
This is a wonderful place to find support and help as we learn to deal with our loved ones that are affected by the disease of alcoholism/addiction
I hate so much that your son is going thru this terrible time - hopefully he will be willing to reach out for help
until then - the best suggestion I can have is to possibly look for help and healing for you - thru reading and posting here, reading recovery literature and possibly attending al-anon meetings - these are great resources to help you know some of the best ways to decide the healthy options you have in dealing with your son.
I know for me in dealing with my adult daughter - they have truly helped me.
wishing you & your son the very best
pink hugs