My EXAH left me too many times for other women, too many lies, fired for selling drugs from the company vehicle.
I didn't really forgive him for a very long time, the abusive relationship went on for too many years. I couldn't get him out of my life until he remarried, then things got better.
Now that I have been in a relationship with a wonderful man for 14 years I can honestly say I have forgiven him. But that doesn't mean I care to ever have any kind of contact with him. I'm just over the pain he caused me and the children. The ones he has had no contact with for 20+ years.
And my AS, yes, I have forgiven him. I also got tired of the conns and lies and now that he has gone NC, it is probably for the best. I am disappointed in his choices, but, they are his choices. As long as he continues to use and abuse a chance for a relationship is extremely small.
It's (IMO) very difficult to get passed the past with an addict. I think that is the reason so many decide to start over. It's scary to think that we could be in that situation forever. To this day my EXAH still uses drugs.