It took me over 6 months into recovery before I even had 'fleeting thoughts' about possibly having 'sex' again. And then it was "OMG how can I do that sober, I don't remember how, I have always been drunk."
BTW I was 3 weeks shy of my 36th birthday when I found recovery. And there were folks there younger than me and older than me that had also had the 'sex issues' in early recovery.
By about a year, close to it, I finally took the plunge. But I have to tell you that talking to others in recovery, both males and females, and my sponsor and her hubby who was also sober in AA, they all reassured me that my 'sex drive' would return, to give it some time and continue to work on ALL the other aspects of me. They were all correct.
As you are learning and seeing 'sobriety' is a lot more than 'just stopping drinking.'
Have you tried any Alanon and/or some one on one counseling for you with a therapist who specializes in addiction? It would be tremendously helpful for you!
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing as we do care so very much.
Love and hugs,