Dear A127, I once held a position of medically attending to alcoholics while they were sick and then, getting them on the road to their recovery program. When I talked to couples together--the guy would almost always assure that "things were o.k." When I talked to the spouse, alone--they would invariably tell me that they hadn't been able to "perform" for eons.
Occassionally, I would have a guy come to me specifically to ask about their performance problems--men seem to have a lot of anxiety about this subject---and I would have them worked up by a urologist--after 3 months of straight sobriety.
For those who remained sober for 3 or more months--and had a fairly happy marriage--sexual impotency tended to remove. Younger men had less problems after sobriety--but, younger men (say mid-late 30's) had a LOT of problems while drinking.
Honestly, in my experience, men seem to have almost as much denial surrounding impotence as denial in alcoholism. I think that often, the apparent lack of libido is actually fear of poor performance.
I hope this helps some.
sincerely, dandylion