Al27

Hi there~ I'm fairly new to alanon, but not new to the steps. I've been riding this merry go round for over 10 years. Hubbie is a dangerous binge drinker... He's dry at the moment after a fearful bout in the car affecting our children, but it's just the most recent one of multiple "I'm never drinking again" promises. I keep hope that this one will be the last. I'm finally ready to accept the 12 steps of recovery for myself and my children, to let to and let god, and to stop being enabling and co-dependent. The strange part of the disease is that it almost becomes more difficult during the times when he is sober, because while he's actively drinking it is all adrenaline and emergencies for months but when the ride stops I have to deal with the ramifications, the worry and anxiety and anger... These are all things I'm a dealing with in alanon. My question today is regarding ... Well... Not an easy subject... Libido in a recovering alcoholic. We are in our mid-30's and are both active and healthy. But he has zero sex drive whatsoever. He gets mad at me for bringing it up. I'm in a quasi- sexless marriage and it is very difficult. I am wondering how common this is and if it ever goes away. It's not just sex, it's also lack of affection and he's constantly irritable and distant, literally pushing me away to the other side of the bed. I've spent the last ten years being faithful and attempting to be supportive to this man that I love but I feel the disease has absorbed my identity and I'm trying to find it again by using the steps. I am not getting any younger and I just don't know how much more I can give up. Has anyone dealt with a similar problem, and if so what was the result? Please share.... Thanks