Hi Euchella,
I'm rather new here too, and at 57, delayed leaving because of the loneliness - but I did anyway. Almost 3 months ago.
He did go into recovery and is now sober for 5 weeks. A miracle, yes! But long enough? No. He is still messed up in his head bless him... and my head is messed up too. But I left him. And it does hurt.
I'm reading Melody Beattie, Codependent No More. I only have one option for Al-Anon in my area on Thursday nights, so someone else on here told me about online Al-Anon meetings. Today I have printed out the telephone schedule for all those meetings. I need something every day. I believe most of my pain is due to unmet expectations/resentment, and I just need to get rid of my own codependent issues, while he works on his alcoholism. But we're apart.
Anyway, google al-anon meetings online and the information should pop up . I hope all gets better for you too. ANd I am SO GLAD I found SR!!! I hope you will be too!
Kind Regards,
HappyTBH57