I had intimacy issues after my divorce from my XAH. I was in high "take care of me" mode for a long time and I surrounded myself with people I knew loved me (my family) while I healed. I had a "bad attitude" toward men in general at that point.
When I first met my (now) husband, he was so kind and gentle. He had been through a pretty traumatic divorce as well and I was so amazed at how balanced and unaffected he seemed. I do believe that God put him in my life because He knew I needed just the right kind of guy. Slowly.....with my husband's gentle guidance, I was able to overcome those intimacy issues.
I hope and pray that your guy is the right guy but if he's not for any reason, I hope that the right kind of guy shows up in your life who will be patient as you let go of the past and step into the present.
gentle hugs
ke