Hi Fleakitty, I am so sorry to hear about your kitty. My deepest sympathy; I too lost two cats over the past year. I'm happy that you were able to resist the urge, just stay in the moment and continue to be the best caretaker you can for your kitty and when the time comes to say your final goodbye, you will know that you were both blessed to have shared the time you had together.
Stay with us on SR, it really does help to get through those difficult moments. I am on day 46 and couldn't have done it without the support I find here!