Panache, cut yourself a break. You are on day 1, it's Friday, and you are simply trying to stay sober. Just try to think about things that will help keep you that way. If you keep it up, you'll have plenty of time to think about all of that garbage. I know, I have a lot of garbage too. But I'll tell you this, I was on day 1 four days ago, and I feel waaaay better today than I did then. And it's only 4 days later. My anxiety level has probably been cut in half already. I feel more confident because I'm not walking around with a hangover, basically I have nothing to hide today. Physically, I feel 5 times better, I even exercised today. Believe me, if you make it through the weekend, Monday you will probably already feel much better. At least I do.
That being said, I can't promise I won't be back on here in a couple of hours craving my ass off. But the cravings have already have gone down. Hang in there and they will for you too. I think a lot of what I was going through was withdrawal, and I think I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel (at least as far as withdrawals go). Good luck this weekend