Originally Posted by
RiverFriend 1Free1 - I believe I drink for a variety of reasons (running from things I don't want to deal with, stress, etc.) and simply because I love how alcohol makes me feel for a while. I have been going to meetings daily and faith has never been much of a problem for me - I feel God has kept me alive through many circumstances I should not have survived. And yes, it's time to stop tempting fate or testing God.
I met with 'my sponsor' briefly last night after the meeting and tried to schedule some time with him - he said he has kids and asked if I do....when I replied yes, he said 'well then you understand' meaning how hard it's been to schedule some time to sit down one on one. I want to start working on the steps (or whatever a sponsor will have me start doing) and my fear is that it will now be another week until he may or may not have time to meet with me. I really want to get started on this now and will certainly keep my eyes/ears open at other meetings for someone with a lot of sobriety and experience with the program. I just have a feeling this guy isn't taking it as seriously as some of the other sponsors I hear talking about working the program.
Consider that you are in judgement.
I learned my reliance is not on anyone, and I cannot blame anyone as I can only submit to the process daily on my own.
Each day is a day, I have to do the work, by myself, in my bedroom when I wake up.
I get my big book, and follow the pages 86-88, and it doesn't matter what anyone else is doing or not doing.
This is about me and God.