I was trying to quit for my first 1 1/2 going to AA meeting but never fully working the steps. And now that I have some sober time I can look back and now why.But I kept drinking after a month or two during this time.. And every single time it was not from bad feelings..
It always was from feeling great and good. I kept getting to well to fast and not letting my self fully surrender to the fact I just cant drink like a normal person in any aspect.
I still kept thinking that it could be different, that just one night of "fun" could be had..
I just kept trying and trying to finally, I didnt want to try anymore.. And I accepted the fact that I just want to give myself a chance at sobriety.. I was 40 years old and never sober in my adult life.. So it began..
For me the AA program works and is just a great way of life.. But I still only can take it one day at a time.. I cant think about not drinking forever or anything like that.. I don't know what tomorrow will bring..
But I know I am sober and won't drink today..