Good Morning, I totally agree with Kindeyes. I think my main goal of attending Al-Anon was not to "cure or fix" my son. It was to give myself tools so that the decisions I made moving forward came from a position of strength and knowledge. I use the program to get clarity...because as we know...dealing with an active alcoholic or addict is a lesson in manipulative craziness. Without some form of rational thinking reminding me that I don't need to play along...I'd still be struggling. I feel I now have the tools to recognize when I'm being manipulated and where I want the direction of MY life to lead...regardless if he is still using or not.