Thank you so much.....
I do think part of this confusion I have about this, is the fact that as I started learning more about addiction; this ENTIRE time I thought not actively using for years on end meant he was in recovery. He told me he was done with heroin in 2005 and hadn't touched it since 2012....(Wow!! 7 years!!, I thought..)
In fact....it was only on THIS THREAD that I learned what someone in ACTIVE recovery should have done when we first got together.....disclose it. Not wait 3-4 months....I learned he was just ABSTAINING from heroin. He may never touch it again. True. But that doesn't mean he was in ACTIVE RECOVERY dealing with its affects and the behaviors associated with addiction. I literally just learned this like last week....so I've been trying to wrap my head arpund all of these new things Im learning about addict behaviors and such.. in a very very short period of time. Its all so fast. This info would be a lot to digest for anyone...now this breakup that, you are right....with a man who I was heavily emotionally invested in...for and truly no good reason....