Pianogirl, I humbly thank you for your kind words! And I am thankful my process of thoughts were helpful in some way! At times posting here just like sharing in meetings, for me can be just getting my thoughts, feelings and emotions in order. In otherwords, sometimes I m not just sure what I m feeling clearly, there are several emotions going on and sharing helps me to get clarity. It helps in that others may, like kind eyes did, share someting too that just confirms or sheds more light on everything. That's why for me its so important to go to meetings (al anon)! I can share, just listen and learn and take what I like and leave the rest.
Pianogirl you too will grow and heal. It takes work that is for sure. Its definitely a process and takes time. Trial and error! And never perfection! Its freeing to have learned, with a new set of tools how to live and let live and always remember to let it begin with me. I just try to pratice what I have learned in every area of my life. Keeping God first as my guide the best I can each day! Examing my motives is a tool that helps me greatly!
You too can have the recovery you desire one day at a time. It will come and you will find yourself growing and changing little by little, don't give up stay strong and diligent. You will be amazed at what god will do in you as long as your willing. Be patient and take care of you.