when we become "addicted" we have developed an obsessive/compulsive disorder - and NEED for the "drug" of choice. this can be substances, gambling, sex, codependency. something that takes over our entire being - body, mind and soul.
so in order to RECOVER from that we have to make wholesale changes in some combination to our lifestyle, thinking, habits and activities. we have to quit FEEDING the addiction. and it's a beast that never rests, always lurks in the bushes, waiting, patient, cunning, baffling, powerful.
it is humbling to realize that being some 7 years or so away from crack addiction (blech!) I am still and will always remain EXACTLY one bad decision away. one "oh what the hell" - one "just a little bit" - one "f*ck it". the thing about addiction is that even in the arrested state of recovery (non-use) addiction keeps pace. if I picked up today, I wouldn't start over...i'd "pick up" right where I left off. if not more advanced.
thus I have to do everything in my power to assure I am never in a space where smoking crack sounds like a GOOD idea. which I have done successfully for whatever 7 years x 12 months per year equals in days. every day I am committed to not smoking crack no matter what. ok so this morning I didn't have to make that statement even before getting out of bed...but at one time I had to. I had to say over and over "not today, no matter what" until NOT using became the new habit. today I am a habitual NON crack smoker.
so for me recovery is a new way of living.