I am in SLAA (Sex & Love Addicts Anonymous) in Boston for a month now, and have been finding sobriety to be very hard. I know I have to stick with it. I cannot got back to my old ways of lying, and cheating. I am finally growing up at age 50+ - it's almost a relief to be sober.
I find myself drifting into fantasy frequently, longing for somebody to cuddle with , to make love with. I even went to a porn site the other day, first time in a month. Such "slips" are to be expected, I think.
Don't beat yourself up if you find yourself drifting into fantasy, or whatever your bottom-line behaviors are. You need to build yourself up now, not tear yourself down.
Being sexually sober is really important. I have not been as successful as I want. It's really hard for me to totally burn my bridges, to leave all my bad habits behind, and become the person I want to be. I know if I stick with it long enough, the reward will truly be worth it.
Hang in there!
Mark