Originally Posted by
Avalon393 
Redatlanta-that is actually EXACTLY how everything worked out. I just totally had a laugh at myself thinking "how did they know that?" I think I have a lot to learn still and even more to accept. It is just hard to think that he is going to have to hit yet another rock bottom. I thought a full blown heroin addiction, jail time, felony charges, and betraying his whole family would be quite enough for him. And at this point I would probably physically pay someone money to get this voice out of my head saying that there is still time and Something I can do to stop this. I feel like I've swallowed a whole bottle of crazy pills.
Avalon393,
Put down the crazy pills and just think of this. Do you want to spend the next days, months or even years of your life waiting for this bottom to happen or for some light bulb to turn on? Do you want to spend each day creating a new thread detailing the ongoing usage and abuse he continues to live in all while you are being torn apart by it.
It is time to put on your big girl panties and make a change. Is this your apartment? Are you the main person on the lease or a secondary. Is the BF on the lease? I believe you previously stated you were the only one working? If so you hold all the cards to your life.
Time to stop being a door mat my dear. It hurts, yes indeed and will for awhile but just be thankful you are not married to this person of have kids with him. You have the right to say that you will not tolerate drinking and or drugging in your home period. Call the cops if you have to.
As a wife of a former drug and alcohol addict and a drunk myself (how do you think that happened. If you can't beat them join them is what happened there) I basically spent 8 yrs being a human door mat. Everyone has there breaking point and you will have yours.
He didn't want to get sober and does not want to be sober. The only reason he did what he did as far as rehab/ AA etc. was to save his azz from going to jail. I would bet money on it. He's living large right now that he got that monkey off his back. Now all he has to do is convince you and he'll be home free.
Please be smarter than that. If he wants you he will do whatever he needs to do to fix himself and hope that one day you may give him another chance. I just don't see that happening in your current situation unless you lay all your cards on the table and make him make the choice. On one side of the table put a picture of the two of you and on the other put a joint and a six pack of beer. He has to choose one or the other. I bet you know what that choice already is though.
Just remember don't waste your time today trying to fix something that is broken and will only let you down again. Take this time to get you back so you can be the best you can be when the right one does come along.:ghug3