All I can say is that I can't hang on to resentments. I have to let things go for me, to be happy in sobriety. And if I want relationships, I have to be the kind of person people want to be around. Are there people I choose not to be around because the relationship is unhealthy (i.e. someone stealing from me), yes. But I carry no resentment. I maintain the boundary, but I don't make a big deal about it or argue all the time. Eventually your family will see the change in you and that these changes are positive. Sometimes things just take time. I didn't get sober to be so bitter and resentful that no one wants to be around me. It sounds like you want to have a conversation in which you tell them that now you've sobered up you can't stand them and they're just going to have to get over it. That just doesn't sound very productive.