For me, I learned I could tell the moment my ex ah relapsed - as soon as I saw his face - it showed in his eyes ~ when in recovery his eyes had a sparkle of hope, love and light - as soon as he lost that sparkle I knew he was in the depths of the disease - as far as when he started abusing the substances - it didn't matter - the mindset of recovery was gone.
In my daughter, as soon as her attitude changes - once she becomes the victim again I know she is in a relapse ~
When they are at their worst, we deserve to be at our best in our program ~ Take good care of YOU - you deserve it!
pink hugs