It's my fault that I am hurting right now I am the one that made the decision to let him back in my life back in November after almost 3 months of no contact. He swore again that this cowboy has finally hung up his hat and is ready to settle down with me. He claims that he was scared because I was what he wanted so he ran. He even swore on our unborn child's life that he will never hurt me again ( only God knows the reason I miscarried). I believe that he is not sure who he is what he wants. He had mental problems that he denies and should seek help for. But I am working on my commitment to move on no ties to him, I feel much stronger than the last time I feel I have closure now. There is no need to wonder if, what or buts. I want to be the old me. I want to work on rebuilding my foundation for a successful happy future. And I get so much love and support here and that means the world to me. I thank you all for your guidance as I build my life back.