Originally Posted by redatlanta

I obsessed this way over my last relationship. He ended it - and I should have. It was a very, very destructive sick relationship not having a thing to do with alcoholism or drugs.

I obsessed for 10 months. Everyday just like you and certainly over those ten months it waned then morphed from extreme anger to sadness and hopelessness that I would never get over. The obsession became and obsession - why can't I stop thinking about the a**hole?????

On to a therapist. She nailed it (for me) in the first session. My problem was not him rather my inability to forgive myself for allowing someone to hurt me so terribly and staying for more. Self flagellation is the way I think about it.

Pointed questions from her like why did you stay, why did you put up with this, why why why - and forcing me to answer was what got me over it. I went to the therapist not for myself really but to describe him and his actions and for her to analyze him and tell me what was wrong with him - I felt that would help me get over it. Btw her analyzes of him was three words 'he's and *******".

It didn't take long once I started seeing her. One day it clicked. It is what it is, I f****d up. Move on.

Been ok ever since.