Your post brought something to my attention that I needed to see with clarity. Your husband is not contacting his children however still wants to be in contact with you. Right? I seems painfully obvious addicts need to try and find an enabler.
I am not implying he doesn't love you or your sons (as much as possible right now). Nor an I implying you are enabling, in fact I see the opposite but I am still seeing a pattern that I have been watching for with addicted spouses with children.