Originally Posted by
Punkin50 
I will be 63 in February. And why I went back is beyond me. I suppose I just wanted to BELIEVE he would change like he said he would. I should have known, I was raised with an alcoholic mother and I remember how she was. Why I thought this relationship would be different I don't have a clue. He like most alcoholics, is the best man in the world when he is sober, but the drinking is becoming more and more and I can't handle it any longer.
Reading this just brought memories to me, I remember thinking that my now XAH was so nice when he did not drink!!! However that just made him a dry drunk!!, so It was my illusion of control that thought "He stop drinking because of me", so the illussion made me think he was a nice person, he was/is my fix, that is why he is toxic to me, NC is a must!
Good luck to you and really hope for the best!