Welcome back,please dont feel embarrassed,this is SR.We dont shoot our wounded.
I am sorry for your loss.
You put the drink down before and you can do it again.Alcoholism is progressive,sometimes quickly sometimes slowly,but progress it does.
Stay away from the first drink,break your time down into short periods if a day seems too long.A day is a long time for an Alcoholic to stay sober.
Be kind to yourself and I wish you well.