I agree with the above, that the addiction and codependency creates impulsive reactions. With my former AH, there was always "rubberbanding"--the alcoholic threatens to leave (or does leave) then the next day has flipped to the opposite emotion: "can't live without you." And as in all alcoholic marriages, the alcoholic acts and the spouse reacts. The alcoholic accuses the spouse of being controlling but in fact it is the alcoholic who is the dominator. Five months sitting in AA does not erase this dynamic. It takes much longer than that for the alcoholic to become a sane and reasonable person again. And if the alcoholic is not really done with the drinking, the alcoholic, consciously or unconsciously, doesn't really care if the marriage dies. Anything standing in the way of more drinking is considered the enemy, and that includes most of all the spouse. So the alcoholic rants and threatens and walks out, comes back, walks out, criticizes, resents, and has a false sense of power in all this because the alcoholic actually doesn't care if the spouse walks away for good--if the alcoholic is not done with the drinking. With nothing really to lose, the alcoholic does whatever the alcoholic wants. And the spouse runs around trying this and that to try to please someone who will never be pleased, if another drunk is around the corner.
So get yourself a good counselor and an Al-Anon group for some sanity. Doing so will make you less of a re-actor and will help you find your core and your principles and the ability to stick to them.
It is very common for the alcoholic who has just puffed up and threatened and walked out to turn around and come back if there isn't anyone else to attach to. And nothing smooths the way back into the house better than promises to go to marriage counseling.
This is often the disease manipulating a comfortable drinking environment again. So be careful.
I personally agree with those who think working on the marriage should follow--not precede-- a several-month intense individual recovery program for both alcoholic and codependent which includes weekly counseling, weekly 12 Step meetings (for the alcoholic once a week is not a rigorous program, and 3-4 meetings a week in early recovery is often recommended), and if there is high volatility and frequent emotional outbursts in the home where there are children present, then separate living arrangements for those several months.
Do not underestimate the power of alcoholism. Do not think you will outmaneuver it. Get support, for your wife will be an alcoholic for the rest of her life, sober or active. Your child will always have an alcoholic mother, recovering or not. So it is best to get busy getting help from alcoholism professionals right away.