what i am in control of today
I have began the process of realizing what i am in control of.
I found myself staring at the clock today thinking "it is noon. Less than 24 hours before he leaves and all he has done is washed clothes and then hung them back up in the closet, and that was yesterday. I dont understand how he is sleeping right now. Why isn't he packing?"
I had a small struggle with wanting to wake him up roughly and yell "get to packing."
But then i realized i am not in control of that. I am not in control of any of it. I am not even in control if him packing nice nice clothes to go to a place inhabitated by homeless people. I am not in control of making sure he is up before noon. I am not in control of where or when he goes. I am not in control of his actions that only allow him to eat, sleep, and leave the house.
I am in control of me, my words, and my actions. I think that is more than enough for me to handle.
But even then God may have other plans for me. And I am just fine with that.
The Belle Of The Ball