Redheadsusie

Well I decided against the little tiny cottage in the neighborhood- My sis and sons don't want me to be near AH - I need to be away from him totally - that is how I always end up back with him - so today I found a wonderful condo in town that is super big and nice owner who is happy to rent to me with a dog. I will have to leash walk my Greyhound which I feel horrible about- but am trying to not freak out as I have cried all day. Homes here are super expensive to rent so I cant get one. This place is so beautiful- and big and the neighborhood is safe and I do have a patio that is fenced. I am a home owner - I won't be living in my house- I will be in someone elses - I can't plant flowers and have my beautiful greyhound statue out front. Damnit I am crying again. I know this is a stepping stone and I wont be here forever - that is what everyone is saying - maybe I will really like it. I called AH to tell him what was going on and when I would be gone - I was crying- he said - now you know how it feels to leave your home- (he has left at my request every other time - he had a free place to go on the water with his parents) How does it feel- did you call for sympathy? Cause you won't get any compassion from me. ........................................How in the hell can someone be so mean and why do I keep thinking he will be nice. I need to do this .............I am scared and afraid. Say a prayer for me.......

DAMNIT!