Audrey-I can totally understand how you feel. With my abf just getting out of rehab last night I am a bit crazed at the moment. Thank goodness for my fave al anon meetin being tonight. I have a lot of fear of relapse, but I don't think that will change until he has at least a month or two under his belt. I am sticking it out for now but taking one day at a time. The bigger issue I see for you (I believe the other thread I read was yours) is te physical abuse. My abf was never a mean drunk
Or an abusive drunk. He just got goofy as then felt sick the next day so he drank to make the pain go away. That said he has pancreatitis so If he doesn't stop drinking he will kill himself. I have told him I will not bury him. If I find out he is drinking again I am gone. I am ok with a one or two day slip as long as he is honest with me and gets right back on track. So at this time-I have to just live one day at a time and see what happens and continue to hope for his recovery. However-if he is abusing you and that doesn't stop with sobriety then you need to leave. Please take care of yourself.
At the same time-pohs friend, your advice is very helpful. Can you go into the first year "hells" a bit? What can I expect?