Audrey, Are you working on you? Seeing a therapist, Alanon, or maybe even reading about codependency??
I wouldn't ever wish a relapse on my husband or anyone else but I wont stay just because he is clean and sober either. When I finally accepted his recovery is his to deal with and that I am powerless, it let go of much of my anxiety.
For me, I have decided I will make a decision when I am healthy, so I can make a healthy decision...otherwise I will just continue the cycle of unhealthy relationships in my life.
Stay focused on you and you fill much better...no matter what you decide!!