Welcome to the forums Shakeitout,
I remember when I left rehab. I was waiting at a train station opposite an off-license. I was waiting there for 3 hours. I never did get that drink. I didn't see the point. A lot of people say that going into the rooms of NA gives them anxiety or panic attacks. Hopefully as your sobriety progresses this will get less extreme and you will be able to walk into one of those meetings whilst feeling calm and serene.
Natom.