I thought the same way last year of summer 11, I had gone on a final 4 day binge and i was drinking like crazy. I drank alcohol straight for 4 days, no food, no water and very little sleep. I was shocked when bars would even serve me! I was getting sick and yet I still picked up and drank more. got sick, picked up more. I spent the whole day puking into a garbage bag and it got full and I had to use another to fill that one up! And I STILL drank! My mind was lost and I didn't care about anyone or anything or myself. I just wanted to drink till I died and I almost did. I missed 3 days of work because I was busy drinking the day away, I never called in sick because I called in enough times that summer that my boss started to suspect I was drinking again (had an issue in the past before with it)
I truly hope you stick to your word on here. I promised so many times I'd quit drinking and I never meant it... I only did so the sickness could go away of my hangover and there I went at it again a week later. it is a powerful foe, alcoholism and it almost robbed me of my life and I am only 28. It only took 7 years of drinking to bring me down to my knees. Get help and do whatever it takes this time to get sober! It's worth it! I now know it truly was worth it because here I am, sober and alive and well. A year and 3 months sober now. I have never obtained a year and past in being sober. I only ever reached 9 months once and ever since it got less and less. Now I am strong and on my feet. Life has been a challenge lately this past year, family passing away, recent break up with my girlfriend of 10 months... which thank god I am grateful today that I have AA because if I wasn't in AA... I'd be out there drinking right now to rid of my pain for a bit. Good luck! If we can all do it, so can you! Willpower! Courage! Strength! Do it! We're all here for you to help!