I'm sorry for what you are going through, it sounds like a lot of resentment, frustration and irritation coming from everywhere. What do you think is holding you back from getting a divorce? Are you hoping things will get better? Are you afraid of being alone?
I know I lived in a loveless marriage for many years and it is a miserable place to be. He wasn't an alcoholic either, we just grew apart. I wonder if the two of you could use marriage counseling to see if there is any way you could get back to a good place. It didn't really help us (as we got divorced eventually), but it did help me to clearly see what it was I wasn't getting from him and how hopeless it all was...