Good point venyl. The point to say I will never drink again is to not leave an open door, not a single one to drink. That diminishes the power of the addictive voice. I tried many times before and somehow had that litle reserve that it was ok to relapse. This time I relapsed while doing AVRT. Relapse was not long, because I knew what had hapenned. I was furious, not at myself more at the beast. I told a member here that I was going to raise my vengeance on my beast, that I would dine in hell the next day. I did, and here I am. I waged my war agaisnt my beast not myself. I do not want to drink, who does then? The beast. All posts here of people saying I don't want to drink anymore. If you say I don't want to have icecream ever again, that would be easy because the Beast does not "need" ice cream to survive. Just my 50 cents