I will be 48 on Friday I think I am to old to start over again. I don't think there is a guy where I live remotely normal. I don't think there is a guy in this Province normal enough to date.
I'm roughly your age and live in Alaska. Where the saying about available men is that "the odds are good, but the goods are odd." So I can relate a bit.
I wasn't ever going to be in a relationship again for as long as I lived when I left AXH. It just didn't seem worth it to me. But through my recovery, I realized that I had been mixing up my emotions and basically going to the hardware store for bread when I looked for available men: I based my choices on attraction rather than compatibility. On tension rather than love.
I'm in a relationship with a man who has been a friend for most of my life. I never thought of him as someone I could love. Until I realized that love doesn't have to be drama. It doesn't have to hurt. Love doesn't have to be Catherine and Heathcliff, it can be Tuesdays in November with a bad headcold and fishsticks for dinner. And it can still be the most wonderful thing you've ever experienced. I just had to make that shift in my mind.