Originally Posted by
Ju5tBr3ath3 
Thank you guys, finding this has made me feel less lonely in this.
I have put the wedding on hold, he has been doing good so far but its early. I've been reading things on here since its happened, trying to understand it and figure out what to do.
It is possible for things to turn out good again isn't it?
breathe,
Your story touched my heart, you remind me of me. You sound young, idealistic and not made hard or cynical by the rotton crap life deals us at times. I am 47 and I still believe in happy endings, love and the basic goodness within us all . What I have learnedin my years and am still learning is to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em.
Read,read,read but try not to let others experiences paint a gray curtain over life, love and relationships. Stay idealistic but work hard to develop your bull s*** detector, learn to listen to your gut (it rarely is wrong) and learn quicky to recognize the red flags that we women in love so easily ignore.
A warning: this is tricky business. There is a fine line between learning the points mentioned above without seeing EVERYONE as negative. It is easy to become cynical to judge to harshly or quickly. Like all things, cynicism in moderation is a good thing.
Pump yourself full of knowledge baby girl, keep it under your hat and just listen and observe while using your knowlegde. Sometime the truth is in our faces but we are distracted and miss it.
Congrats on postponing the wedding, if this man is worthy of you, is a real and decent man, all that should reveal itself to you shortly. Dont rush and remember listen to your guts.
With love,
Freeatlast