Originally Posted by
Findingmyself4 
I don't know who I am without alcohol, I have made it my identity. How do I get past my shyness without drinking? I am going to one of his family members weddings this weekend and I have no idea how I am going to cope without drinking and having his family ask me about our marriage plans. Please help I need some advice and words of encouragement!
Thank you!!
You are the same person you were before drinking. It's not an identity but a bad habit. From what you said in your post, it is clearly not working for you; it's not bringing you out of your shell but just creating more problems. I have no doubt you can do fine at the upcoming wedding. All you need is a plan. Do you have a plan?
1. Figure out when you have to be at the wedding and when you can leave. Set a deadline.
2. Are you in the wedding party or just an observer?
3. What is expected of you from others and what do you expect from yourself?
4. I find the anticipation of social events is much worse than the actual event. Is it the event or the actual anticipation?
5. Will you have assigned seats or can you sit wherever you want?
6. Is this a daytrip or will you be spending the night somewhere?
I think once you have a plan and can defuse some of the stressors you associate with your drinking, perhaps you will have an easier go of it. Remember, most women love weddings and most dudes hate weddings (especially the reception). If you follow sports, find one of the dudes that is watching a game on his phone or tablet. I am pretty certain there will be one guy there doing that with a couple of other dudes around.
Drink some orange juice when other people hit the sauce and watch and observe the magic.