Originally Posted by
renegayd 
I am only worried now about cutting contact with her, she will never let me just not talk to her, she will annoy my dad if I don't answer or just change my phone number, I want to stay in contact with my dad when I get home but need to find out how best to cut contact, and how to leave, eg; what to say to her about why I'm going, If I say 'I'm leaving because you are an alcoholic, I never want to talk to you again,' it will start an argument and wont help, I feel I should say, 'I love you, I will be waiting for you to wake up to yourself' but I know now that will not help either, If I say nothing, will she know why I left and will she ever change?
Two things -- I'll take the second one first:
2. If you say nothing, that will have exactly the same effect on her as if you had said, "I'm leaving because you are an alcoholic, I never want to talk to you again." That is, none. It does not matter what you say -- it has no effect on an alcoholic. She'll do what she's going to do. However, the flip side of that is that because you have no control over her, you are also
not responsible for what happens to her. So you can stop obsessing about it. You don't have control -- you just have the
illusion of control. Basically, I'd say as little as possible on the way out the door, just to minimize the drama... but that's your call.
1. As for the phone number, I highly recommend getting a Google Voice number. It's free, and you can do all sorts of things with it -- including not answer! I have one, and I basically just use it as a voice mail box -- it's the number I use on my resume, so that when recruiters call, I don't have to waste too much time talking to them; I just listen to the messages, then decide who I want to call back. The other thing that's great about it is that you can get one with any area code you want -- so it gives the person no clue as to your physical location. I'm in the USA, and my Google Voice number is in an area code from the state next door -- the idea is to make it look like I'm closer to the city than I really am, so employers will be more likely to call.
Good luck!
T