But see he asked to reschedule. So in his warped mind when he talks to others it becomes "yea man, I was stuck and asked to reschedule and she ignored me" blame. Deflection.
So sorry to hear he played his trump card. He ignored you and spoke to the kids. Made you look bad in front of the kids. Disgusting. See, your situation is different then min in that the kids are older, there is phone convo and he doesn't see them supervised. It sounds like you have no voice. He isn't listening to you. The only thing I can suggest is set up very strong boundries. My x is not allowed over my house, no phone calls. We meet supervised at the park for 2hrs, and that is that. I have blocked his *****'s home phone and have tried to block his email, but for some reason just starting getting them. But, he never emails (well rarely) so who cares. I don't respond to anything he says anymore. And, after this last cancelation I'm done. If were rich, I would take all his 2hr a week rights away from him lickidy split...so, right now I am watching my son keenly and have a plan in place. Right now random visits are working. I could set boundries because I had the court ruling in my favor. That's how I gained some power, but I still try to play as fair as possible. Every descision I make I see myself befor e a judge bc I don't want to loose what I have. Of course, my son's well being is number one.
How can you gain some control? How can you make it that you are not at his whim. The yo yo is unfair to YOUR broken heart and well being. Is there family in town that can be the nuetral zone? The drop off and pick up zone. Maybe he doesn't need to come over your house and strut around giving you uneeded anxiety. What boundries can you set that he will or has to listen to. As of right now, he told the kids he was coming and they want to see him. You can't take that away. But you can make it easier on yourself in someway. How? You need and deserve calm and happinesss. There is a sticky called flight or fight and this was me for a year. Its hard. But, we have to deal with these addicts bc children are involved so you must make it work for you. Think and analyze. Talk to your lawyer. Spell out exactly what youwant. I feel for ya mama! Sending blessings your way!