Well crap!! The meeting is in 10 minutes and my friend taking me isn't coming (had to call & see if she was on the way) now. I don't have a car & can't make it in time now.
My instant reaction was wanting to cry out of frustration & disappointment. I do feel like she gave me a song & dance. However... I feel that this gut reaction feelings I'm having is based on my emotions running FAR to high right now & the fact that I am emotionally unhealthy right now. I'm going to use this as a learning tool of "If I want something it's up to ME to do it & don't be disappointed in others for letting you down". Who knows why she blew me off after she offered to do this. I have no idea what is going on in her life & have no control over it.
So, there is another meeting tomorrow within walking distance of me & I will go to that tomorrow, on my own, as I am in control of MY reality. Right now I crave if I'm going to feel disappointment it is not because of any other reason than I let myself down.
I do truly hate every minute of what is happening as does anyone else in my shoes or similar & look forward to looking back on all this in a healthy way some day. GRR!